Valentine's Day: Express your love when dementia is present

Every human being communicates and understands love differently. For some, the big proclamations are most meaningful, while others appreciate the small, consistent gestures more. As we learn our person’s preferences, we adapt the ways we express our affection.

The voyage involving some form of dementia means the Care Partner must once again shift the way she demonstrates her devotion.

Valentine’s Day’s fast approach offers us an opportunity to ask how we can convey our fondness in a way that is also meaningful for the person navigating cognitive changes.

How do we make the day special within this new journey’s context?

“Dementia may impact a person’s ability to celebrate Valentine’s Day as they once did, but there are ways families can adapt the holiday to express love, connect with one another, and show that person how much they mean to you,” says Jennifer Reeder, a director for the Alzheimer’s Foundation of America, in an article.

If you want to give your person a gift, consider a scrapbook that includes snapshots of joyful events you shared, and spend time discussing them.

Consider engaging your person’s senses by preparing a comfort meal they enjoy, and savor the familiar fragrances as they fill the home. You might also create a playlist of romantic songs that you both loved, or bring them a flower bouquet.

The Alzheimer’s Foundation of America also suggests penning and then reading a love note to your person, noting that the exercise benefits the writer, too.

You might also contemplate ways to cultivate a little self-love, acknowledging your resilience, beauty, and compassion. You could spend a few minutes practicing self-care — journaling about your strengths, calling a friend whose voice feels like a hug.

You can step beyond your comfort zone and book February’s free Self-Care Saturday yoga and breathwork class Saturday, Feb. 8 at 9:00 a.m.

This month, we explore how to cultivate a felt sense of beauty, belonging, and worthiness, leaving participants with a full self-love cup. Email the instructor, Jess, for more information on joining this beginner-friendly class.